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Thursday 1 November 2012

Disney Star Wars


IMAGE OF THE DAY:
DISNEY ACQUIRES LUCASFILM FOR $4 BILLION


PRESENTED WITHOUT COMMENT

Friday 28 September 2012

Shuttle Flypast

Shuttle Tyderium Takes Final Flight




Imperial Shuttle Tyderium took its final flight last week and completed a spectacular flypast over the Forest Moon of Endor. 

Riding piggyback on a specially fitted Boeing 747, the stolen Imperial Shuttle flew over the Forest Moon, famously the scene of the Empire's ultimate defeat at the hands of the Rebellion.

The shuttle was used by Luke Skywalker and his rebel friends, to infiltrate the Forest Moon of Endor; and destroy the Empire's shield array protecting the second Death Star.

After it's final series of piggy back flights, the shuttle will go on permanent display at the Mos Eisley Spaceport on Tatooine. 

Thank goodness those old codes checked out after all.

Sunday 29 July 2012

Old Flames

*London 2012 Olympic Games Exclusive*

Our friends the Bothan spies scored another scoop this week. 

Ahead of last Friday's Danny Boyle's Opening Ceremony of the London 2012 Olympic Games, speculation was rife about who would be igniting the cauldron with the iconic Olympic Flame.

However, as we revealed on Twitter (a full 5 hours before the ceremony), the Empire's closely guarded secret was busted; thanks to those fearless Bothan's.


So, there you have it, Lord Vader lit the cauldron and watched those famous flames rise. Ironic really, since Luke will do the same thing to the Dark Lord himself at some point in his future. After all, it is his destiny!

Saturday 21 July 2012

Choices

SO YOU THINK MAKING A CHOICE IS EASY? 
BEFORE DECIDING YOUR FATE; JUST REMEMBER:


THERE'S ALWAYS A CATCH!

Wednesday 6 June 2012

Transit

Image of the Day
A Rare Shot of a Transit Across The Sun
An amazing celestial event occurred in the solar system yesterday. This stunning image of a transit across the sun is such a rare event that it won't happen again for over a century, or 2117 to be exact.


Make the most of this image as it won't be seen again in your lifetime.

Saturday 19 May 2012

Hanging Out With Emperor Palpatine


The Empire says it will go to Galactic Court after a Tatooine gallery exhibited a painting with Emperor Palpatine's genitals hanging out of his robe. 


The Emperor painting in the Mos Eisley gallery
Dack Ralter's controversial painting is an "abuse of freedom of artistic expression" said an Empire spokesman; and said Darth Vader had asked lawyers to get the Mos Eisley Spaceport Museum of Modern Art to remove the painting, entitled "The Emperor".


Yada Nemolea, spokesperson for the Gallery, which runs the "Oppression of The Empire" exhibition, defended the painting.


Yada said the painting was as "a very satirical look at galactic politics...and of the Empire's turn to the dark side". The painting is intended to depict the Emperor as being as "just an ordinary guy with his knob out, and less of a fearsome, ahem, dictatator".


The Emperor by Dack Ralter
Gallery lawyers have been in touch with Emperor Palpatine saying the painting "will not be removed and is a form of freedom of expression within the galaxy". 


The painting has become a huge hit and people are flocking in their thousands to see "Palpatine's Weapon", as it has been affectionately dubbed.


We've pixelated the image of the painting shown here, but if you would like to view it, get down to the Mos Eisley Spaceport Museum of Modern Art and judge for yourself. 


Personally, we here at Jedi Order PR, think it's just a load of old bollocks.


Inspired by the original story of Jacob Zuma's controversial painting courtesy of The Times Live

Monday 14 May 2012

Destiny

"I like suggestion number 5: If all else fails; try throwing your boss down the nearest reactor shaft."